I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
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