Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Randomize