I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
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