i don't like sucking hair
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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