Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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