You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize