i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Randomize