I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize