Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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