Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
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He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
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IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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