I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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