He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize