Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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