Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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