Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
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