You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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