he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Randomize