I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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