so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize