Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I wish i was in the wii world.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
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