YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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