whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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