the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
The air taste purple.
Randomize