You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize