I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize