yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
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something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
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You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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