so explain again why im purple
no
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
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Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
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I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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