try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
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