The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
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How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
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I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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