conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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