What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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