I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
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