Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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