Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize