Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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