Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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