It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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