Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
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