Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
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I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
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You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize