Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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