So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize