I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize