does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
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It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
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Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
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