is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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