wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
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we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
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That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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