You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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