Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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