his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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