He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
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I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
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He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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