just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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